Valentine’s Day is around the corner and love is in the air. But–let’s be real–it’s always a good time to try strengthening your relationship with your spouse. One great way to better your relationship is by having meaningful pillow talk.
Below are 5 secrets to help your pillow talk time. And to make these tips easy to remember, the first letters spell out “P TALK” for “pillow talk.”
5 Secrets for Pillow Talk (P TALK)
Use pillow talk as a time to praise your spouse. Frequently giving sincere compliments will help your relationship thrive. Not only will a compliment boost your spouse’s confidence and encourage them, but looking for ways to compliment your spouse will also remind you of their wonderful qualities. Therefore, both of you will feel deepened love toward each other.
T- Tune In
It is so easy to get distracted these days. Smart phones, the TV, and other devices are stealing our attention away from each other. Use pillow talk as a time to really tune into your spouse and give them your full attention. Put the phone away. Turn it off if you need to. Relationships take effort and this little secret will allow you to focus on the most important person in your life. By tuning in, even if you don’t have quantity time you can have quality time.
A- Ask Questions
This secret is especially important if you are a talker. I like to complain, share good news, and gab about other parts of my day. Because of this, I have to focus on asking questions to give my husband a turn to talk.
Get to know what is on your spouse’s mind by asking them questions. You can ask questions about their dreams, goals, frustrations, high points, etc. I suggest doing “best and worst” where you can each share the best thing and the worst thing that happened to you that day. It’s a quick and easy way to keep up on the day-to-day events, and then if you have extra time you can dive into deeper topics.
During pillow talk, give your spouse your full attention. While they are talking, really listen to what they are saying and try to find ways that you can better support and love them. Acknowledge things they say and work on showing empathy. Click here for a post that will give some great advice on how to be a better listener. (The post is geared toward listening to children, but has good general listening advice that is very applicable when listening to a spouse too.)
I know that “cuddle” doesn’t start with “k,” but pretend with me that it does so that I can spell out P TALK. Be sure to cuddle with your spouse! Having that physical connection while you’re talking together will help you bond. And who doesn’t love a good cuddle?
My hubby’s pillow talk tip: Have a pillow. Not as cute or creative as my 5 secrets to having meaningful pillow talk, but I’ll admit that a pillow does make pillow talk better.
Hopefully this post has given you some good ideas for how to improve your pillow talk. If you’ve enjoyed this post, check out these other posts on 5 New Year’s Resolutions for Your Marriage, 7 Ways to Show Your Child You Are Listening, and Valentine’s Day Traditions Your Family Will Love.